The Way for God to Break Us

Marriage is God’s ordination. If a man or a woman is still not married after having passed the right age for marriage, there is great pressure upon them. Yet after they are married, their spouse also becomes a pressure. Without having to learn, every husband knows by nature how to wear down his wife. Likewise, without having to learn, every wife knows by nature how to give her husband a hard time. Someone may be altogether unmanageable, but once he sees his wife, he becomes just like a mouse coming face to face with a cat. Marriage life is a consuming life. Being married and yet not being consumed is an impossibility. Why are there divorces? It is because some people give up on marriage life, unable to endure the sufferings any longer. Sixty years ago when I was still young, an older person told me that marriage life is a “yoke.” As soon as a person gets married, he is “yoked” and “shackled.” Then, is marriage good or bad? Actually, marriage is very good because it is sovereignly [330] arranged by God for our transformation. It is impossible to be transformed without first being ground.

The same is true in the matter of bearing children. If a woman has no child after she has been married three years, she is under a great deal of pressure to have children. However, once she gives birth to a child, the child becomes an additional pressure. A certain sister may be very difficult to deal with. Before she is married, her parents do not know how to deal with her, and after she is married, her husband does not know how to deal with her either. However, after she gives birth to a difficult child, she will be consumed and softened. Regardless of how strong or stubborn you are, God has a way to break you and transform you. After seeing others being worn down by their children, a sister once said, “I do not believe it is that hard. Wait till I have a child; I will discipline him and make him an obedient child.” Eventually, after having her own child, she was even more helpless than the others. You can call the police when your house has been burglarized. However, if your children are disobedient, do you also call the police? No! You are afraid even to tell your neighbors or relatives. Our children are the most capable of wearing us out. The wives who wear out their husbands and the husbands who wear out their wives are not as skillful as the children who wear out their parents. The children’s skillful wearing-out tactics really consume the parents.

Hence, from this viewpoint, character is not cultivated by having a strong will or by ill-treating the body. Rather, character is the issue of transformation in our pursuing of the Lord. Because we love the Lord, God arranges our marriage and our family in such a way so that we can be broken and be transformed.

Furthermore, the church life with all the brothers and sisters also consumes us. As humans, we have to be Christians; if we are not, we will end up in the lake of fire. However, after we become Christians, we have to live the church life. Many people acknowledge that in the church life we experience five flavors—sweet, sour, bitter, pungent, and salty—which are all for our breaking and termination. If we are still not broken, there will be high heat and great pressure to grind and crush us. Sometimes the elders grind us every day just like millstones. While the unbelievers only have a human family, we have two families: a human family and a divine family. Furthermore, both families are “yokes” and “shackles” to us, so [331] there is no way for us to escape. If someone is tired of his job, he can either resign or endure until he retires. However, the family “yoke” and “shackle” will cease only at death. This is God’s ordination; it is not decided by us but arranged by God. Therefore, Romans 8:28 says, “We know that all things work together for good to those who love God.” God arranges all things to work together in order to break us, press us, and grind us into powder for our transformation.

We all know that according to God’s eternal purpose, we cannot run away from God. In His eternal plan with His foreknowledge and in His wisdom, God chose us before the foundation of the world. Then according to His plan, we were born in this age, we grew up, we were called, and now we live the church life. Because we are constrained by God through the environment, it seems that we have no alternative but to take this way. However, in reality, if we walk on this way willingly, we will be blessed by God. Even though we have some sufferings, still we will be full of joy. Although we may have some hard times in our family and in the church, still we will be full of joy. The more we are willing to suffer, the more joy we will have; the more joy we have, the more we will be transformed. Eventually, a godly character will be manifested.

Hence, we are not speaking about character as the product of the so-called nurturing of human nature. Rather, we are speaking about the kind of character that God wants. After we have the Lord’s life and Spirit in us, we begin to receive the breaking and the consuming so that the Lord, in His life, can add more of Himself as the Spirit into us for our transformation, which issues in the character that God wants. In order to be useful in the service to the Lord, we need to receive a great deal of training in our character. The progress of character training altogether depends on the extent of transformation, and transformation is related to the growth in life, the knowledge of the truth, and the daily filling of the Holy Spirit. All these matters complement one another and require our earnest pursuit.

PURSUING THE KNOWLEDGE 
OF GOD’S ETERNAL ECONOMY

Besides the four points mentioned above, we need to pursue so that we may see and know God’s eternal economy. This is the deepest utterance in the Bible. The word economy may also be translated [332] as “intention,” “plan,” “arrangement,” or “dispensation.” If we desire to be those who follow the Lord, it is not adequate merely to grow in life, pursue the truth, be filled with the Holy Spirit, and be transformed in our character. We also must know the economy of God.

Ephesians 3:11 says, “According to the eternal purpose which He made in Christ Jesus our Lord.” The eternal purpose made by God is His economy. In Greek, the word for eternal means “of the ages,” and the word for purpose means “plan.” Hence, the eternal purpose of God and the economy of God are not two things; they are just one thing. The eternal purpose is the eternal plan that God made in eternity past, and this eternal plan is God’s economy. The carrying out of God’s economy is God’s operation. Economy is an intrinsic plan, while operation is the practical carrying out of the economy.

The Greek word for economy is oikonomia, which means “household law,” “household management,” “household administration,” and, derivatively, “a dispensation, a plan, for administration.” The Bible shows us that God has an economy in Himself, and this economy includes God’s eternal purpose, plan, dispensation, and intention. When this economy is revealed and carried out, it is His operation.

In order to know the economy of God, we must study Ephesians 1:9-11 and 3:9-11. We all need to study these six verses thoroughly and remember them by heart. These six verses are all concerning God’s economy as the mystery of mysteries. If we recite and study them well, we will enjoy the benefit for our entire life.